Chicagoland MG Club: Driveline October 2008
Fall Tune-Down and Chili Party
November 9, 2008 -- 10:00 am - 4:00 pm
82 King Drive, Streamwood, IL

This was a big hit last year, so don't miss it. Cowboy has a low lift drive-over hoist so we can do some underbody inspection, maybe a few oil changes, some tune-up work or minor repairs. Bring your own parts, oil and a jug for oil disposal (and yes, you will take your own away). Chili and drinks will be provided. Please see the club website at
www.chicagolandmgclub.com/photos/tunedown07
for pictures and the article from last year’s event.


Tales of the Mongrel
The Alter-Ego of Ralph Arata
“The Neutralizer”


The massive C-130 Hercules Air Force Transport flew south from a US military installation in Milan, Italy toward a secret destination in the lower Balkans.
This was a covert mission launched from the “Farm”, an anti-terrorist base of operations located deep in the northern Allegheny Mountains known only to the US President and James Evans who was top fed in the US Justice Department.
The aircraft carried a small and dangerous cargo! One 1972 race prepared MGB and one soldier a.k.a. Ralph Arata, a.k.a. the Neutralizer! Both were headed to an airstrip near Belgrade, Serbia where final prep would be conducted before the 2.5 hour drive to Novasad (Serbia’s 3rd largest city).
A satellite controlled nuclear threat had been identified almost causing the Yankee Nuclear facility to melt-down. Evans had placed the Farm’s computer genius, Rienout Vogt, on the assignment to try and trace the source of those satellite transmissions which carried the signature of Sir William Hedrick’s, the arch rival of both Vogt and Arata!
The C-130 hit the tar-mat, its reverse thrusters in fully engaged. The craft came to halt as the bombay’s hydraulics initiated, lowering the huge cargo door to the ground, the soldier’s thoughts drifted to his last night with the gorgeous and

 

brilliant mission controller back at the Farm, Susan Simpson. The Neutralizer broke from reverie as the throaty exhaust of the B’s special built 300 hp V-6 came to life. Tom “The Doctor” Josefek sat behind the wheel with a grin. The “Doc” came on the trip having to conduct finishing touches on the battle weary MG.
“Hey, soldier, time to climb aboard and go!”, the Doc said. Diagnostics are showing the front SU running a little rich but the “B” should be OK! “Thanks Doc”, Arata replied!
15 minutes later the Mongrel raced along the ZEB4A motorway running east of Belgrade. Arata kept the speed-hungry B at 80mph as the post-Balkans War patch-work motorway was the not smoothest road by any stretch and played hell with the “B’s” racing suspension and the low profile P-8s. The blinking light on the dash told Arata that Reinout was calling him on the com-link.
The Neutralizer pulled the MGB to the side and out of the way – going to the boot he pulled the small satellite uplink and laptop. The uplink sparked and Reinout’s face appeared on the laptop LCD. “You forgot the shave this morning my friend”, said Arata. “You mean that I forgot to sleep last night”, came the reply!
However, I have a very definite lead for you in Novasad. An abandoned winery about 15 kicks from city center. I have picked some very interesting micro waves that look like the type of thing Sir William would use. “Be careful my friend, as you know, Sir William is always prepared to receive guests!”, said Reinout.
The Neutralizer was mid sentence in his reply when he heard the whine of high powered engines running top speed from a short distance. The Soldier slammed the equipment back onto the boot and raced for the “B’s” 14” Porsche-styled steering wheel just as 2 Renault “Megan” mid-engines came roaring over the horizon (the Renault Megan is a V-6 turbo diesel mid-engine that look much like an Audi TT). The Soldier crammed the stick into first and power shifted to second as the P-8’s grabbed for blacktop and the physics propelled the MGB forward. Its’ 300+ horses rocketed the MG ahead of the Megans beginning to distance a bit from them.
Yes, the sly Sir William was very good at welcoming guests and had sent the appropriate welcoming party. The only issue facing the Neutralizer was surviving the welcome!
The Soldier’s senses went “battle-alert” and battle strategy filled his mind. He hit the 8 inch GPS monitor that filled the B’s console where the radio had once domiciled. He watched the terrain ahead looking for his move. But as he studied the monitor a Megan was upon him to his right!!!
The soldier quickly grabbed the Heckler & Koch Mack-10 sub-gun from the B’s rear jump seat and racked the slide to chamber the first round.
The Soldier swung his gun hand over the passenger seat quickly slapping his knuckles against its leather ready to unleash a NATO 40 caliber parabellum “hello”…………………
…………….. OOOOOOOUCH!!! Cried my wife Susan lying in bed next to me!! I, like the soldier I was dreaming of, I went into quick battle mode ready for anything, quiet, thinking and ready for what was coming …… which was a big smack in the face for waking poor Susan, again, in the middle of the night! Now my face hurt! God, I have to try counting sheep!

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